10/31-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV ON P-SPAN
From the Kokomo Civic Theater
Kokomo, Indiana
HOST: Johnny Suave

THIS WEEK ON PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV:
-PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism confronts Starz N. Stripes
-Movie Classic returns
-A battle between television giants: NCISF’d vs. The Extreme Weather Network
-PCW’s latest rookie sensation Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych in action against former PCW Television Champion ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke
-The WWR’s A. Kuluha Bacardi has an announcement
-Review of PCW Tag Team TV Tournament
-Khalid El of the Axis of Evil in action
-Hunter the Hunter and NRA (SarahPAC) vs. The Green World Order

Johnny Suave stands in the ring with the PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism. Crowd: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!” Suave: “WELCOME TO PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV…ON P-SPAN!  I’M JOHNNY SUAVE AND IT IS MY PLEASURE TO INTRODUCE TO YOU, THE PCW CHAMPION, THE HOLLYWOOD A-LIST, STONE CHISM!”Crowd: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Chism: “How?  How can YOU boo ME?  I’m a star!  You love me.”Crowd: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Suave: “I’m sure it has nothing to do with this.”

REPLAY: 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
Chism: “Now, before we have this six man tag team match here tonight.  I want Starz N. Stripes to come out here so we can have a little man to man talk.”  Starz walks out a few seconds later.  Chism: “Starz.  Look, I know you’re a good wrestler.  I’m glad you’re on my team.  But there can only be one ’star’ leading the Progressive Alliance and, well, that’s me.  You need to do the right thing on October 18th at PCW-MVW Lock and Load 4.  Now, I was going to show the ‘I Pledge’ tape to you again tonight.  But instead, I’ve come up with something better.  This is what I want you to do, Starz.”

Eva Mendes comes to the ring.  Mendes: “I pledge to lay down in support of Stone Chism.”  Mendes lays down.  Chism: “See?  It’s that easy.”  Cameron Diaz is next.  Diaz: “I pledge to do the right thing and lay down for Stone Chism, the PCW Champion.”  Diaz lays down in the ring.  Courtney Cox climbs into the ring.  Cox: “I pledge to do the right thing.  I will lay down for our PCW Champion Stone Chism.”  Cox lays down.  Next, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore.  Suave: “Okay, I think I’m going to be sick now.”  Kutcher and Moore: “I pledge to be a servant to our PCW Champion.   Kutcher: “And don’t forget all mankind.” Moore: “Oh…right.”

Chism: “So, Starz.  What’s it going to be?  All you have to do on October 18th is…lay down.  One.  Two.  Three.”   Starz simply stares at the PCW Champion and doesn’t respond.

REPLAY: 10/7-PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV
‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido, Starz N. Stripes, and ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
vs.
Midnite Rockin’ Xpress-Bobby Ricky Michaels and Marty Gibson-Lane and ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
Chism clotheslines Starz N. Stripes.  Suave: “CHISM JUST ATTACKED STARZ AND STRIPES!”  Chism grabs a waist lock and Belly to Belly Suplexes Starz down onto the chair!!  Suave: “HOLY CRAP!”   Chism sets the chair up.  Pedigree!   Chism smashes Starz’s face right into the chair!

Marty Gibson-Lane sets a chair on Escondido….450 Splash onto the chair! The ref starts the count. …1 …2 …3

Chism: “Oh…that.  Look, people.  The reality is that in life, people have their places.  Your’s is sitting out there.  Mine is…well…right here being your PCW Champion.  And Starz N. Stripes?  It’s laying down for a fellow member of the Progressive Alliance.  So, Starz?  If you’re in the building.  Here’s your chance to do what’s right.  Come on down.”  The crowd gasps when Starz, eyes wrapped in gauze, is slowly led to the ring by his tag team partner ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido.  Chism waits expectantly as Escondido helps Starz into the ring. Chism: “Now, Starz.  Everyone feels bad about what happened to you at the hands of the Axis of Evil.  But it still doesn’t relieve you of your obligation to pay proper homage to me, the PCW Champion.  So, even in your blinded state, you can do the right thing now and lay down for me.”  Starz calls for a microphone and Charlene Ann Beckworth, the ring announcer, hands him one. Starz: “Chism, let me get this straight.” Escondido turns him to face Chism. Starz: “Oh…Chism, let me get this straight.  After you took me a few weeks back and then my tag team partner and co-holder of the PCW Tag Team title, Chris Escondido, you still expect me to do the j-o-b for you?  Hell no!”  The crowd cheers; Chism throws a fit.

Chism: “No, no, no.  That’s not the way it’s supposed to go.  *I* am a member of the Hollywood Elite.  I am the PCW Champion.  I am a star.  You, are just a Captain America wannabe with none of my charisma or star power.  No one cares that your poor eyes got burned.  What they do care about is making me happy.  And nothing would make me happier than you accepting your place in the food chain and-” Escondido takes the Tag Team Title belt and blasts Chism in the mush with it.Suave: “ESCONDIDO JUST DECKED THE CHAMPION!”  Immediately, the Hollywood Left pour out to the ring: George Clooney, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Sean Penn, Michael Moore, Matt Damon, and Alec Baldwin.  They attack Escondido. Suave: “SEVEN AGAINST ONE!  HOW FAIR IS THAT?”  No one notices Starz N. Stripes slowly unwrapping the gauze from his eyes.  Suave: “WAIT!  HERE COMES THE AMERICAN HEARTLAND COALITION!”  American Trucker, Dave the Mechanic, Average Joe, SNAFU, and Tequila Sheila race down.  Starz’s eyes are totally unwrapped and he calls for a chair.  Tequila Sheila obliges and slides it in under the bottom rope. Suave: “WAIT!  STARZ CAN SEE!  STARZ CAN SEE? *CLANG*  CHAIRSHOT TO GEORGE CLOONEY.   *CLANG*  CHAIRSHOT TO TIM ROBBINS!  *CLANG* CHAIRSHOT TO MATT DAMON!”  Trucker, Dave, Joe, and SNAFU whip Michael Moore into the ropes.  Tequila Sheila pulls the top rope down and Moore goes Ric Flair over the top rope except he misses the ring apron and crashes to the floor.

The Innovator of Extreme Broadcast Excellence Rush Limbaugh leads a charge down the aisle with Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin, The Queen of Extreme Ann Coulter, and Glenn Beck right behind him.  They go right for the PCW Champion and begin to stomp away at him.  Beck gets a couple cheap shots in on Baldwin, Starz turns and blasts Beck with the steel chair.  *CLANG* Down goes Hannity.  *CLANG*  Ann Coulter.  *CLANG*  Limbaugh.  *CLANG*  Ann Coulter again.  *CLANG*  *CLANG*  *CLANG*  Ann Coulter again.

PCW Security flock to the ring to break up the brawl. Suave: “LET’S GO TO A COMMERCIAL WHILE THEY TRY TO CLEAN THIS MESS UP!”

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Every Monday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

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Dream Wrestling Federation

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Suave: “WHILE WE WERE GONE, KHALID-EL AND THE AXIS OF EVIL CAME OUT AND CLEARED THE RING!  STONE CHISM MADE HIS ESCAPE BEFORE KHALID-EL COULD GET HIS HANDS ON HIM.  KHALID-EL NOW WANTS TO MAKE AN EXAMPLE OF SOMEONE.  WHO’S THE LUCKY VICTIM?”

Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring. Charlene Ann: “In the ring already, from the Axis of Evil, accompanied by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, he is KHALID-EL!”  Khalid-El glares at the crowd. Charlene Ann: “And his opponent, coming to the ring.”  Jobber the Hut and Movie Classic literally have to drag Dick Van Dam to the ring. Charlene Ann: “He is DVD, DICK VAN DAM!” Crowd: “CANNON FODDER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap), CANNON FODDER! (clap clap clap-clap-clap).”

MATCH #1
Dick Van Dam w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
vs.
Khalid-El w/Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (Axis of Evil)

Suave: “So, it’ll be Khalid-El versus a slightly reluctant Dick Van Dam in our first match of the night.  Jobber the Hut has a death grip on DVD’s arm and won’t let go.  Movie Classic climbs into the ring. Movie Classic: “DVD.  I totally understand why you don’t want to face this monster over there.  But don’t do it for me.  You see, the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth, that God governs in the affairs of men. And if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without His notice, is it probable that an empire can rise without his aid? We have been assured, Sir, in the Sacred Writings, that ‘except the Lord build the House, they labor in vain that build it.  Were my soul trembling on the wing of eternity, were this hand freezing to death, were my voice choking with the last struggle, I would still, with the last gasp of that voice, implore you to remember the truth: God has given America to be free.  And whereas it is the duty of nations as well as of men, to own their dependence upon the overruling power of God, to confess their sins and transgressions, in humble sorrow, yet with assured hope that genuine repentance will lead to mercy and pardon; and to recognize the sublime truth, announced in the Holy Scriptures and proven by all history, that those nations only are blessed whose God is the Lord.  Let us look forward to the time when we can take the flag of our country and nail it below the Cross, and there let it wave as it waved in the olden times, and let us gather around it and inscribed for our motto: ‘Liberty and Union, one and inseparable, now and forever,’ and exclaim, ‘Christ first, our country next!’”

DVD: “Fine…I’ll do it.”  Suave: “Hell, after that stirring rendition of famous quotes from Ben Franklin, Patrick Henry, Abe Lincoln, and Andy Johnson, I might even climb inside the ring!”  The bell sounds.  Khalid-El walks to the middle of the ring.  Kick to the stomach of DVD.  Lift.  F-5.  Cover.  One…two…three.  Suave: “On second thought, maybe not.”

WINNER: KHALID-EL in :23

Suave: “At least we got a good speech out of it.”

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BACKSTAGE- ANITA DUNN

Cut to Paige McGillicutty in the back. 

Paige: “With me now is Anita Dunn, head of the A.D.D. movement.  Anita, you want to refute some charges that have arisen over the past week about PCW CEO Barack Obama’s connection to High Octane Wrestling’s Lee Best, who’s right now sitting in a Chicago jail.”  Anita: “Yes, Paige.  I just want to reiterate that everything that’s being alleged is…totally Fox News’s fault.  That’s right, instead of wasting my time and the PCW CEO’s time, you should be investigating Fox News.”  Paige: “Um.  What does Fox News have to do with Obama’s friendship with Lee Best?”  Anita: “Fox News isn’t even a real news organization.  They’re the propaganda arm of the Republican Party.”  Paige: “Oh.  Like MSNBC is for the Democrats?”  Anita: “What did you say?”  Paige: “Never mind.  So, what you’re arguing is that we should ignore any possible connection between a man sitting in jail right now and the PCW CEO simply because you don’t like Fox News.”  Anita: “That pretty much sums it up, Paige.”  Paige: ‘Okay.  I’m Paige McGillicutty in the back.  Let’s send it to Johnny Suave.”

Suave: “Thanks Paige.  A. Kuluha Bacardi of the World eWrestling Rag is also in the back with our own Gina Ramsey.  Gigi?”

BACKSTAGE- A. KULUHA BACARDI

Gina: “Thanks Johnny.  With me is A. Kuluha Bacardi who is here to make a big announcement.  A?  Go ahead.”  AKB: “Thanks Gigi.  I am here tonight to announce that the WWR will be holding it’s second supershow on December the 20^th from the Island of Puerto De Macoris.  We’re hoping to get attract wrestlers from many different federations for this show.  PCW will have a match or two.  I’m sure the Missouri Valley Wrestling Association will have a match.  I’m hoping that this time we can branch out a little farther.”  Gina: “Okay, so in less than two months, the WWR holds its second supershow down at the Island of Puerto De Macoris.  Johnny?”  Suave: “Thanks, Gina.  The first supershow was a huge success.  I can’t wait for the second one.  Back to the ring.”

MATCH #2
Hunter the Hunter and NRA w/’The Alaskan Pitbull’ Sarah Palin (SarahPAC)
vs.
GreenPete and “Extreme Vegan” Brock Cole Lee w/PeaceNick and Peta from PETA (The Green World Order)

The bell rings.  Hunter the Hunter and NRA hit stereo corner clotheslines on their opponents.  Double team lift…double sidewalk slam on GreenPete.  Lee charges.  SarahPAC sidesteps a charging Lee and sends him to the floor.  Hunter on the apron. He rushs and nails a running kick to the chest and face of GreenPete on the floor. Sounded very painful indeed. Hunter climbs to the top turnbuckle.  Lee goes over and pulls Hunter down.  Top rope bulldog by Lee to NRA.  Lee pounds away at him while GreenPete holds off Hunter.  NRA is back in and whacks GreenPete in the back with a chair.  NRA facelocks Lee while Hunter goes top turnbuckle.   Lee runs NRA into the ropes and in the process, crotches Hunter.  GreenPete on the offense.  Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on NRA, Russian leg sweep by Lee on Hunter, snap mare and chinlock by GreenPete to NRA and a basement dropkick to Hunter by Lee.

Suave: “Fast paced action here.”  GreenPete climbs the turnbuckle now while Lee matches up with Hunter.  Sarah Palin up on the apron and pushes GreenPete off, NRA helps him up and then flings him through the ropes to the floor.  Double team on GreenPete. NRA puts GreenPete iupside down in the corner.  Suave: “HE’S TIED TO THE TREE OF WOE!”  Palin in the ring with a chair.  She runs towards GreenPete.  A younger man hits the ring and clotheslines Palin.  Suave: “HOLY CRAP!  THAT’S LEVI JOHNSTON!”  Johnston kicks away at Palin.  Hunter forearm shivers him from behind.  He puts him in a superplex position.  Wham!  GreenPete back in the ring and hits a sit down slam on Hunter.   GreenPete gets a boot to each member of SarahPAC.  Springboard missile dropkick by Lee to Hunter!  SUPERKICK to Lee by NRA! DRAGON SUPLEX by GreenPete!!  Enziguiri by Hunter to GreenPete, followed by a tornado DDT! STIFF clothesline by Lee to Hunter!  Superkick to NRA. Double team inverted powerbomb/Cutter by GreenPete and Lee.  GreenPete slaps on a Boston Crab to Hunter.  NRA in to break the hold. Springboard clothesline/powerbomb combo by SarahPAC.  Palin crawls out of the ring.  She grabs Hunter’s bear trap and puts it in the corner.  Johnston gets up and starts yelling at Palin.  Hunter pushes him from behind and *SNAP*  Suave: “BEAR TRAP!  BEAR TRAP!”  Johnston screams out as the pain shoots up from his foot.  PeaceNick and Peta are horrified and immediately come to Johnston’s aid.

Lee also distracted by Johnston’s plight.  NRA slips in and scoops Lee up.  Suave: “GUN RACK!  GUN RACK!”  NRA puts max pressure on Lee’s back.  GreenPete gets atomic dropped by Hunter.  Lee taps out.

WINNER: NRA and Hunter the Hunter in 9:14

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MISSOURI VALLEY WRESTLING ASSOCIATION

Taking Women’s E-Wrestling to a Whole Different Level

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Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

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MATCH #3
Andrew DiNozio and Jim McGee w/Larry Jeffrey Gibbs (NCISF’d)
vs.
Steve Abrams and Mike Bettis w/Jim Frascantore (Extreme Weather Network)

Suave: “This ought to be fun.  NCISF’d debuted over the weekend on PCW House Shows and looked very impressive.  The Extreme Weather Network has taken offense as they claim to be the premier TV based Tag Team in PCW.”

(the bell rings)

Suave: “It’ll be DiNozio and Bettis to start.”   They circle.  Lock up.  DiNozio tries for a Ace Crusher but Bettis blocks.  DiNozio turns to McGee.  DiNozio: “You try, proby.”  McGee: “What?”  Gibbs: “Just get in the damn ring!”   DiNozio tags in McGee. Bettis punches McGee repeatedly. Bettis makes the tag to Abrams. Bettis with an exploder suplex on McGee. Bettis executes a spinning DDT, planting McGee’s head in the mat. McGee gets bounced off of the ropes and hit with a backdrop diver by Bettis.  McGee Russian Leg Sweeps Bettis.  Bettis bounces right back up and puts McGee in the double underhook position.   Double underhook backbreaker.  Bettis sucks chants start in the crowd.  Bettis throws McGee to the floor.  Zavida Zavid over.  She karate chops Bettis.  Side headlock into an inverted DDT.  McGee is back on his feet and takes advantage by punching Bettis repeatedly.  McGee puts his hand on Bettis’s forehead.  Suave: “CLAWHOLD!”  Gibbs: “Clawhold?”  DiNozio: “Really.  That move is so 1950’s.  Back in your time, Gibbs” *WHAP*  DiNozio has been Gibbs’d.   Bettis back on the ring apron.  He nails McGee with a huge slingshot sommersault splash.  Zavid over to help again. Steve Abrams goes top turnbuckle.  Senton on Zavid!  Crowd: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!”  Bettis drags McGee up the aisle.  An ardent Weather Network fan hands him a chair.  *CLANG*  That pisses off the NCISF’d fans.   Gibbs directs DiNozio to give McGee a hand.  DiNozio claps.  *WHAP*  DiNozio gets Gibbs’d again.  DiNozio with a chair.  *CLANG*  Bettis down.  DiNozio drags McGee back to ringside.  Abrams sneers at DiNozio as he goes up and helps Bettis back to the ring. 

Bettis and McGee both back into the ring.  Bettis stomps McGee’s head. Suave: “Abrams, who did absolutely nothing save a Senton on Zavida, tags back in Bettis for Extreme Weather Network.  And Bettis has been doing all the work.”  Double axhandle chop from Bettis.  Suave: “And proby…I mean McGee really needs a tag.  Wait!  McGee’s back up  He’s got a side headlock on Bettis!”   McGee DDT’s Bettis.  Bettis comes right back.  He scoops McGee up… running powerslam!  McGee rolls out to the floor.  Gibbs turns to his team.  Gibbs: “Do I have answers yet on how to beat these guys?”  Abby is feverishly working away on the forensics side.  Darryl Dukey Malliard offers a couple hypothesis’s.  Meanwhile, McGee gets a huge gutbuster on Bettis.  They lockup. McGee sends Bettis to the steel barricade.  McGee hits a spinning leg lariat on Bettis sending him over the barricade into the crowd.  One of the Weather Network fans throws a cup of beer in McGee’s face.  Abrams over…he lifts and nails a front-layout suplex on McGee.  Bettis is up and climbs over the barricade.  Zavida over to hit him with a back fist.  Suave: “Wild action back and forth.  AND WAIT A MINUTE!  THE ULTIMATE, THRILL-SEEKING, DEATH-DEFYING, LAY IT ALL OUT THERE, JIM FRASCANTORE IS ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!”  Frascantore jumps.  Zavida greets him with a thrust kick that nearly takes his head off.   Suave: “Well, so much for that.”  

Zavida German suplexes Bettis thru a table!  McGee gets back to his feet and climbs in the ring.  Zavida kicks Bettis in the groin and drags him back to the ring.  McGee tags in DiNozio.  DiNozio comes from behind and bulldogs Bettis.  Bettis back up and tries to line him up for a cradle suplex.   DiNozio reverses.   Bettis reverses right back and wraps his legs around DiNozio’s neck.  Suave: “Figure-four sleeper. Ron Martin is checking for a tap out.”   Gibbs finally has enough and stomps on Bettis making him  break the hold.  Bettis back to his corner and brings in Abrams.  Abby and Dukey run up to Gibbs with the solution.  DiNozio puts Abrams in an arm grapevine.  McGee goes airborne and hits Abrams with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle.  Abrams is back on his feet. DiNozio tries for a tilt-a-whirl suplex but Abrams escapes out.  DiNozio takes Abrams down with a knee.  DiNozio wraps his arms around Abrams for a belly-to-back suplex but Abrams sits out and blocks it.  DiNozio tries for a springboard DDT but Abrams slips out of the side headlock and whips him to the ropes.  Gibbs again jumps in and clotheslines Abrams.   Gibbs kicks Abrams in the stomach and executes the sitdown face slam.  Zavida does a cartwheel and kicks Abrams in the face.   DiNozio tags in McGee.  McGee mule kicks Abrams. Abrams is up again.  McGee makes the tag back to DiNozio. Abrams gouges DiNozio’s eyes.  Bettis in the ring- he superkicks DiNozio. Gibbs in again.  He flattens Bettis with a clothesline.  DiNozio sends Abrams to the corner of the ring.  Zavida clocks Abrams from behind and sends him back out towards DiNozio.  DiNozio thrust kicks Abrams in the head. DiNozio covers Abrams hooking the leg.  Ron Martin makes the count. …1 …2 …3

WINNER: NCISF’d in 16:33

Suave: “An impressive statement made by NCISF’d.  And it looks like Gibbs has something to say.”  Gibbs: “Let it be known that if you mess with NCIS, you’re going to get ******.”  Gibbs throws down the microphone and leaves.

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