Book burnings...bionic arms...and soccer players going rogue.  What more could you ask for?

PCW Extreme Political TV
Agora Theater
Cleveland, OH
Saturday November 14th
Host: Johnny Suave

Suave reviews the PCW Rankings…

PCW WORLD CHAMPION: ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TELEVISION CHAMPION: SNAFU (Independent)
CONTENDERS:
#1- Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
#2- Khalid-El (Axis of Evil)
#3- Bird ‘The Mark’ Ridfych (Independent)
#4- ‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (Old School Kings)
#5- Newt Tron Bomb (American Patriots)
#6- American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS:  ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (Progressive Alliance)
PCW TAG TEAM TELEVISION CHAMPIONS: Big Oil and Big Electric (Public Utilities)
CONTENDERS:
#1- A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb (American Patriots)
#2- Midnite Rockin’ Xpress- Bobby Ricky Michaels/Marty Gibson-Lane (Old School Kings)
#3- Jack and Bull Schett (Ron Paul’s New Libertarian Army)
#4- NCISF’d
#5- Extreme Weather Network-Steve Abrams/Mike Bettis (EWN)
#6- The Goatbusters (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

Tonight on PCW Extreme Political TV:

Blue Dog D and RINO vs. Newcomer Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)

Raving Rednecks Locke and Loade (American Patriots) vs. Island of Misfit Wrestlers

PCW Champion Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance) vs. Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

American Trucker (American Heartland Coalition) vs. Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)

Suave: “Here comes PCW’s latest signee, Shaun Phillips.  Phillips as you might know was one half of the DWF Tag Team Champions USXF with Amy Mason who just signed with Missouri Valley Wrestling.  American Patriots Leader Eric Cantor hopes Phillips can help spearhead their resurgance.  We’ll find out starting tonight as Phillips and T-Bag take on the Bipartisan Dream Team Blue Dog D and RINO.”

MATCH #1
Shaun Phillips and T-Bag (American Patriots)
vs.
Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) and RINO (American Patriots)

…Suave: “Phillips makes the tag to T-Bag.  T-Bag in…and OW!  RINO greets him with a chop.  T-Bag takes a step back.   Mule kick.  RINO didn’t see that coming!  OH!  T-Bag just kicked RINO in the groin!  RINO bent over in obvious pain.  He makes it to his corner and brings in Blue Dog D.  Blue Dog D in.  He runs the ropes…slingshot bodyblock!  T-Bag slow to get up.  Blue Dog D goes top rope.  INCOMING!  SHOOTING STAR PRESS!  Blue Dog D for the win…1 …2…NO!  T-Bag kicks out.  Unbelievable!  T-Bag slowly gets up.  Blue Dog D with a waistlock…now a waistlock suplex!  Blue Dog D covers…1…2…AGAIN!  T-BAG JUST KICKED OUT!  Blue Dog D is pissed.  He thought he had him…he throws T-Bag through the ropes to the floor.  RINO!  RINO’S CHOKING T-BAG WITH A MICROPHONE CABLE!  Here comes Blue Dog D…FALLING SPLASH!  GOOD THING RINO GOT OUT OF THE WAY IN TIME.  SHAUN PHILLIPS OVER!  BLUE DOG D GETS BACK INTO THE RING!  GORE!  GORE!  PHILLIPS FORGOT ABOUT RINO AND HE JUST BLASTED HIM WITH A GORE!”  RINO takes T-Bag and heaves him back into the ring.  Suave: “Phillips still down after taking a Gore from RINO.  Blue Dog D with a running lariat and that bounces T-Bag hard off the mat.  Blue Dog D walks around him…he’s measuring  him…”  Blue Dog D pulls T-Bag up and tucks his head under his armpit.  He hoists him up, and then falls back onto the floor.  Suave: “FILIBUSTER BUSTER!  FILIBUSTER BUSTER! COVER!  DAVEY KEELS COUNTS…1 …2 …3!“

WINNERS: BLUE DOG D and RINO in 9:43

Suave: “BLUE DOG D AND RINO MAKE THEIR RETURN TO PCW AND THE BIPARTISAN DREAM TEAM ARE VICTORIOUS!  BACK WITH MORE PCW AFTER THIS…”

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_______COMMERCIAL BREAK_____

MVWA 14 from Carbondale, Illinois

Replay of Miss USA-Jill Berg Match from DWF Golden Dreams

MVW Champion Miss USA speaks

‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick’ Tessa Mason and Caroline Kelly
vs.
Sabrina James and Alicia Rowe
vs.
Katie Collins and ‘Texas Cowgirl’ Haley Dallas

The Star Trekkies
vs.
Vatican Vice Squad
vs.
VIP Brin and Sky

Corrina Romanov
vs.
American Pi

‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy
w/The White Trash Posse and Trailer Park Barbi
vs.
Weathergirl Hallie

After a replay of last week’s MVW/DWF Women’s unification match, Miss USA has some observations to make.  The overriding question is will the 49-1 Jill Berg come to Missouri Valley Wrestling to continue her pursuit of excellence?

Two three team tag team matches highlight the card.  The first match sees former DWF newcomers Amy aka…’Extreme Pizza Delivery Chick Tessa’ Mason and Caroline Kelly taking on former PCW wrestlers Sabrina James (formerly Mercedes in PCW) and Alicia Rowe (former Porsche Lexus) and former 3 time PCW Women’s Champion Katie Collins and the “Texas Cowgirl” Haley Dallas.

Match two sees The Star Trekkies meeting up against the always tough Vatican Vice Squad and VIP Brin and Sky.

Corrina Romanov begins another quest for gold as she meets up with the uber intelligent American Pi and Weathergirl Hallie also starts the long climb up with a match against ‘Trailer Park Skater Girl’ Tanya Hardy.

All this and more Sunday night on MVWA 14.

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Every Monday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

Agganis Arena, Boston, MA
November 16, 2009

Johnny Otaku v Black Mamba
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Doozer v Scottywood
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Standard Match.

Mario Maurako v Jason Midnight
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Standard Match.

Shane Reynolds and Erites Kallisten v Graystone and Kirsta Lewis
The referee for this match is Frank Tsonga, and the rules are Tag Team.

“Perfect” Paul Paras v Aceldama©
The referee for this match is Romeo Ward, and the rules are Submission Match.
______________________________
______________________________

Suave: “Friday night, a shocking and disturbing incident took place at a Sarah Palin book signing…”

SARAH PALIN BOOK SIGNING
Suave (voiceover): Palin was signing books when this happened.”  Three masked men barged their way to the front of the line.  The first man removed his mask.  Suave (voiceover): “THAT’S RIGHT!  IT’S LEVI JOHNSTON…”  Johnston takes one of the books and clubs Palin in the side of the head with it.  Then the other two take their masks off.  Suave: “…AND MSNBC’S KEITH OLBERMANN AND HIS PALIN-HATING SIDEKICK SHANNYN MOORE! (if you don’t know who Shannyn Moore is- click here)”  Olbermann and Moore pile a stack of Palin’s book ‘Going Rogue’ on the table.  Johnston pushes a dazed Palin to the floor.  Then he reaches into his pocket and lights a match.  A huge fireball appears and torches the books.  Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT!  LEVI JOHNSTON, WHO’S CASHING IN ON THE ‘HATE-PALIN’ SENTIMENTS AMONG THE LEFT, USED A FIREBALL AND SET HER BOOKS ON FIRE!  OLBERMANN, WHO FLATLY REFUSES TO APPEAR IN A PCW ARENA BEFORE EVERYTIME HE DOES, HE GETS CHOKE-SLAMMED BY THE EXTREME EQUALIZER WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT, KICKS AWAY AT PALIN WHILE MOORE, WHO SEEMS TO HAVE AS MUCH OF A GRADE SCHOOL CRUSH ON PALIN AS OLBERMANN DOES, JOINS IN!”

*The opening riffs to Def Leppard’s ‘Rock, Rock Til You Drop play*

Suave: “THAT’S RIGHT!  IT’S THE EXTREME EQUALIZER- WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT!”  A lane opens up among the people in line and WTF races to the table.  Olbermann’s eyes light up when he sees WTF coming and he quickly scurries out the back.  Moore also makes a quick exit leaving Levi Johnston to face the Extreme Equalizer.   WTF grabs him by the throat…lifts…and WHAM! Right through the burning table.  Crowd in line: “PCW!…PCW!…PCW!…” 

Suave: “Somehow, I don’t think we’ve heard the last of the Johnston-Palin feud.”

MATCH #2
“The Raving Rednecks” Locke and Loade (American Patriots)
vs.
Mr. Jaundice and Captain Nausea w/Movie Classic (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)
Gary Locke and Earl Loade hit the ring as Toby Keith’s “Who’s Your Daddy” plays.  Suave: “THE RAVING REDNECKS ARE BACK IN PCW TO TAKE ANOTHER CRACK AT WINNING THE PCW TAG TEAM TITLES!”

…Suave: “…ELBOW DROP BY MR. JAUNDICE FROM THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!  WE COULD BE ON THE VERGE OF SEEING AN UPSET?”  Mr. Jaundice goes up again.  Locke nails a ropeflip hiptoss.  Suave: “LOCKE GOT HIM WITH THE HIP TOSS.  MR. JAUNDICE SCRAMBLES TO THE CORNER AND TAGS IN CAPTAIN NAUSEA.  Captain Nausea in…he whips Locke to the corner. Mr. Jaundice gets a cheap shot from behind.  Captain Nausea sets up…elbowdrop.   Mr. Jaundice runs back in…he drops the leg Locke.  Gary Loade’s had enough.  He’s in.   HE DDT’S  CAPTAIN NAUSEA TO THE MAT! LOCKE AND LOADE HAVE HIM UP…HERE IT COMES…WHAM!  FOUR-D REDNECK DEATHBLAST!  LOCKE COVERS…1 …2 …3!”

WINNER: ‘THE RAVING REDNECKS’ LOCKE AND LOADE in 6:32

Suave: “LOCKE AND LOADE WITH THE WIN OVER THE ISLAND OF MISFIT WRESTLERS!  MORE PCW AFTER THIS.”
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_______COMMERCIAL BREAK_____

Every Thursday Night from our friends at High Octane Wrestling

The Best Arena, Chicago IL
November 19, 2009 12:00 AM

Bobbinette “Queen B” Carey v Chris Kostoff
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Justin Decent v Rush Marconi
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

David Black© v Dawn McGill
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

“The Headhunter” Michael DeNucci© v DavoteK
The referee for this match is Rick “Even” Stevens, and the rules are HOFC Bout.

Jatt Starr v Ethan Cavanaugh
The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

Max Kael© v Chris CK
The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.
_______________________

Dream Wrestling Federation

Bishop Steele vs. Force

Adrien Cochrane vs. Daymare

Remy Leroux vs. Marshall

Upton Osgood vs. Zero

Company Policy vs. eGG Bandits vs.
Brothers of Prophecy vs. chicKEN Chokers
Non- Title 8 Man Tag

Lupin Cy vs. Jay Price vs. 501
Triple Threat

___________________________
___________________________

Suave: “Speaking of Dawn McGill.  She once again took High Octane Wrestling’s ICON Champion Max Kael to the limit this past Thursday night.

(courtesy of High Octane Wrestling)
REPLAY: ICON Champion Max Kael vs. Dr. Annabel Lecktor
…Rubbing her eyes Lecktor starts getting angry as she walks over to the timekeepers and grabs a steel chair as she slides back into the ring and goes after Max with the chair, who ducks the swing and takes Lecktor down with a drop kick to her knees.  But instead of continuing his offense, Max again tries to rip the mask off Lecktor.  She fights him off once again and hits him hard with a backfist which allows her to use the steel chair, cracking Max across the skull.  She discards it as she grabs Max’s leg and goes for the pin.

Joe Hoffman: Max tried again for that mask and he ate that steel chair as a result.  But we have no referee to make the count.

Suddenly we see HOFC referee Rick Stevens start to sprint down and slide into the ring as he starts to make the count for the pinfall.

1……2…….NO!!!

Max Kael is able to kickout as Stevens gets up from the mat and seems a bit lost inside a ring as a stunned Max gets back up to his feet and Lecktor goes for another spinning heel kick which this time does connect with Kael as she quickly locks in the testicular claw on Max as Stevens isn’t really sure if this is a legal move as he asks Max if he wants to submit.

Joe Hoffman: A quite unique submission move by Lecktor as she has a firm grip on Max’s…..Max’s…..

Benny Newell: BALLS……I dropped my shot glass….what’s going on in the ring?

Max seems to be in immense pain as he pulls himself over to the ropes slowly as Lecktor tries and pull Max back, which puts even more strain on a certain area of his body.  Max continues to pull himself across the mat as he is able to grab onto the bottom rope as Stevens calls for Lecktor to release the hold and this time Max rolls out of the ring, realizing that he was very close to loosing the match.

Benny Newell: Did she just have his junk clamped in her hand?  Damn!  I usually have to pay to see shit like that.

Joe Hoffman: Glad you have decided to rejoin the match Benny.

Max storms around the ring before he slides back in and goes after Lecktor who ducks a wild punch and counters with a martial arts kick that Max is also able to duck as he drops to his knees and goes for a low blow on Lecktor which connects but has little affect on the lower female anatomy of Lecktor who smiles and shakes her head as she knees Kael in the head and goes for another pinfall on the ICON champion.

1……2……..3….

Joe Hoffman: Do we have an upset?

Max lifts his leg up onto the ropes as Stevens stops the count as Lecktor for a second thinks she has won the match before Stevens yells out “NO!” and the match continues on.  Lecktor is down messing around as she lifts Max up from the mat and places his head between her legs and lefts him up onto her shoulders.

Joe Hoffman: A great showing of Lecktor’s strength lifting Max Kael who looks a good 50 pounds heavier then her.

Benny Newell: You sure I’m not paying to see this?

Lecktor has Max up in the air and Max again tries to pull the mask of Lecktor off….but realizing that he is about to be dropped to the mat he delivers a couple quick punches to Lecktor which allows him to escape from the powerbomb she was attempting and connect with a jawbreaker that dazes the masked female and sends her down to the mat for a moment as she pulls herself back up to her feet.

Joe Hoffman: I don’t like where this is heading for Lecktor….Max has turned his attention from the mask…

Benny Newell: Did I mention you should be wearing a mask instead of her yet?

Joe Hoffman: Yes….you mentioned that.

Benny Newell: Good….

Benny tosses another shot back, as Max stares at the dazed Lecktor for a few brief seconds before Max connects another European uppercut and then he hooks her neck and hit the lightning spiral on her which lays her out in the middle of the ring as he goes for the cover that Rick Stevens slides in to count.

Joe Hoffman: The Singularity….thanks for coming Lecktor.

1………2………..3…………..

Stevens calls for the bell as Max’s music plays but Max is not concerned with the victory he has just gotten or celebrating it.

Bryan McVay: The winner of this match in 11 minutes and 39 seconds….MAX KAEL!!!

Max just stares at Lecktor as instead of getting up from the mat he reaches over to Lecktor and with her out he reaches for her mask and slowly removes it from her face, revealing that it is not Annabel Lecktor…..

Joe Hoffman: Dawn McGill?!?  Dawn was really the girl under the Lecktor mask.  For the second week in a row she pushed Max to the limit, nearly defeating the ICON champion.

Shocked that the woman under the mask is Dawn, Max slowly get back to his feet as Dawn starts to stir on the mat.  Max continues staring in shock as she climbs back up to her feet, starting too look back at Max Kael, who is surprisingly looking at her with a look of respect, maybe for pushing him to the edge for the second week in a row.

Joe Hoffman: Well it seems McGill wanted to get Max Kael’s attention and it seems with her showing tonight that she has gotten that and dare I say some respect from the ICON champion?

‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism is in the ring with the Skanky Rich Bimbos Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan.  Chism: “Okay.  Why would you want to watch a fake icon when you can see a REAL icon right here…me.”  Chism then parades the SRB around and then wants to know who the next person is who’s going to do the right thing and ‘lay down in the ring for him?’ 

Movie Classic comes out with the 375 pound Jobber the Hut lumbering right behind him.  Suave: “Jobber the Hut is good for about a half a minute…after that…forget it.”  

MATCH #3- Non-Title Match
PCW Champion ‘Hollywood A-Lister’ Stone Chism w/The Skanky Rich Bimbos
vs.
Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)(The bell rings)  Suave: “There’s the bell.  Chism is goofing off…not a good idea in the first thirty seconds of the match…JOBBER HOOKS HIM IN A FULL NELSON!”  Jobber rams Chism into the corner turnbuckle over and over.  Suave: “CHISM IN TROUBLE…COVER HIM!  COVER HIM!”  Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan hit the ring.  Suave: “NO!  Wait…I mean…YES!”  Hilton and Lohan get Jobber’s attention and then whip their tops off.  Suave: “WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!  WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!”  Chism pulls himself up.  Suave: “OHHHH!  CHISM GOES LOW AND JOBBER IS BENT OVER.  CHISM FLOATS AROUND…NECKBREAKER!  COVER!”  Davey Keels counts. …1 …2 …3!

WINNER: ‘HOLLYWOOD A-LISTER’ STONE CHISM in :49

Suave: “AGAIN, THANKS TO THE SKANKY RICH BIMBOS, STONE CHISM GETS ANOTHER WIN IN PCW!”

PCW NEWSLINE w/ GINA RAMSEY
Gina: “PCW CEO Barack Obama again fends off questions about his association with jailed High Octane Wrestling owner Lee Best.  Anita Dunn and her A.D.D. crew continue to try to change the conversation to Fox News by blaming Fox’s association with the American Patriots for fueling the controversy.  But as Best’s trial in January looms in the future, could the PCW CEO be drawn in?

“In other news, Lou Dobbs leaves CNN.  Rumor has it that he could become a spokesperson for the American Heartland Coalition.  The AHC refused all comment on the matter.

“University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert has been offered a contract by PCW. 

No word on whether she’s accepted the offer.”

UPCOMING PCW EVENTS:
11/18- PCW House Show
11/21- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/2- PCW House Show
12/5- PCW Extreme Political TV on P-SPAN
12/9- PCW House Show
12/12- PCW/MVW Night of Champions
12/20- WWR ‘Christmas in the Caribbean’ Supershow in Puerto De Macoris
12/26- PCW Year End in Review
______________________
______________________

The crowd boos as Dr. Bill strolls down the aisle.  Suave: “Dr. Bill has kept a low profile since his claim that Dr. Annabel ‘The Cannibal’ Lecktor bit off his arm was proved to be a hoax.  But what is up with the steel bracing and stuff on his arm?”  Dr. Bill: “SHUT UP!”  He raises his arm up.  Dr. Bill: “DO YOU SEE WHAT THAT CANNIBAL DR. LECKTOR DID TO ME?”  Suave: “Ah…no she didn’t.”

Charlene Ann Beckworth in the ring to announce the Main Event.  Charlene Ann: “Weighing in at 233 pounds, from Berlin, Germany, accompanied by Dr. Bill, Baron Von Munchke!  His opponent…”  Von Munchke grimaces when the crowd boos him.

*Bobby Bare’s Tequila Sheila begins to play*

Suave: “And here comes the American Trucker being led to the ring by Tequila Sheila.”

Pour me another Tequila Sheila,
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
For all the damn gold in Juarez.

I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila
And lay down n’love me again.

Though I can tell you about it
But don’t mind my gun by the bed
I feel kind of naked without it
And it eases the fear in my head.

Just pass me the salt n’the lemon
Bend down n’blow out the light
I never had trusted the woman
But Sheila I’ll trust you tonight.

Chorus:
Pour me another Tequila Sheila
Take off that red satin dress
I cross the border and I beat the dealer
Dor all the damn gold in Juarez.

I feel like old Pancho Villa, Sheila
And sure could use a friend (I got Pesso to spend)
So pour me another Tequilla Sheila,
And lay down n’love me again..

Charlene Ann: “…weighing in at 225 pounds, from Gary, Indiana, a member of American Heartland Coalition, accompanied by Tequila Sheila, American Trucker!!!”

MAIN EVENT:
‘The King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke w/Dr. Bill (Old School Kings)
vs.
American Trucker w/Tequila Sheila (American Heartland Coalition)
…Suave: “Von Munchke with a short lariat and puts the American Trucker  to the mat.  Von Munchke slides down and tries to grapevine American Trucker’s arm.  Trucker pulls the arm back and slides away.  Both men now circling each other.  They lock up.  American Trucker shoves Von Munchke back…spinning back kick on Von Munchke!   American Trucker with a waistlock…belly to belly suplex!  He covers…1 …2…NO!  Von Munchke slips out!   Kick to the face by American Trucker.  Von Munchke pushes back.  He pins American Trucker against the ropes and…CHOKES HIM WITH HIS FOREARM!  TEQUILA SHEILA UP ON THE APRON…SHE GETS PUSHED OFF BY VON MUNCHKE.  FIREMAN’S CARRY BY VON MUNCHKE…AND HE SLAMS HIM TO THE GROUND!  NOW DR. BILL UP ON THE APRON WITH HIS…BIONIC ARM…whatever…HE SWINGS…TRUCKER DUCKS!”  Von Munchke gets the full force of the steel enhanced punch.  American Trucker with new life…slingshot elbow drop to Von Munchke.  American Trucker rains down punches now.   Headscissors takeover on Von Munchke.  Von Munchke lifted up…JAKE BRAKE!  JAKE BRAKE!  American Trucker covers…1 …2 …3!”

WINNER: AMERICAN TRUCKER in 11:55

Suave: “AMERICAN TRUCKER WINS AND BARON VON MUNCHKE IS PISSED!  HE’S GLARING AT DR. BILL AND I WOULDN’T WANT TO BE IN HIS SHOES RIGHT NOW!  WE’LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!”